Thursday, March 31, 2016

That evil 'J'

Assalamualaikum w.b.t. :)

My biggest fear.
Is to deal with myself.
Of being jealousy.

I am one with that weakness.
Of being jealous at the wrong time, with wrong people.
Feeling insecure. Heh.
I thought I've overcome this after 8 years.
But no, am still living with it. Just realize it anyway.

How to deal with this? *cries*
Not that I have no trust but I just couldn't control myself to be one.

Am still stuck with this.
Need to deal this with my own self.
Fighting with all negative thoughts.
Of all thing I could win, this would be the ultimate lose.

Clearing up mind. I hope I could win this time.
Because I'll be living with this. For a long time. With God's will.
Prepare for the worst.
Oh I need to be strong! Need to be strong! Need to be strong!

But deep down inside......
I'm still lose anyway.

P/s: I is sad.

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